1. The opinions, views, beliefs, philosophies of life, and body positions expressed herein are not necessarily those of the Federal Government, the State of Alaska, the Municipality of Anchorage, The University of Alaska, its administrators, faculty, or non-faculty employees, the United Nations, the Federal Bureau of Investigation, the Central Intelligence Agency, the National Security Agency, the Environmental Protection Agency, the National Football League, the American Association of Retired Persons, Alcoholics Anonymous, The Salvation Army, Sachs Fifth Avenue, Arby's, Jesse "The Body" Ventura, Sean Cassidy, One Guy from Italy, the Borg, Tom Bodett, Yitzhak Shamir, the Everly Brothers, Murdoch from "A-Team," the Vienna Boys Choir, Tammy "Peaches" Ketchum, Senator Cantor from Standard Oil, OJ Simpson, Stephen Hawking, Steven King, Steven Spielberg, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Stevie Nicks, Steve Miller, Steve Martin, the makers of the Chia Pet, Remington Steele, Immanuel Kant, Stan Lee, Ayn Rand, Jackson Pollock, J.R. "Bob" Dobbs, Sean Ryan, Kurt Vonnegut, Scott Baio, Jerry Lewis, Kip Tyner, or any of the inhabitants of Norway.

But they could be.

For all we know, any of these folks could be really bizarre -- bizarre enough to be proponents of the things one generally finds here. But we don't know. We can't attach any of this mental oscillation to them, however @$^@$# hilarious that would be.

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