Acceptable forms of payment for CDs

by John Schumacher
1) case of alaskan amber
2) case of wine
3) cask of amontillado
4) maps to homes of the rich and famous
5) maps to homes of the poor and repugnant
6) architectural blueprints (to include electrical/alarm systems) of
a certain house in a certain college town on the west coast
7) major role in the Hasidic Historical Society's re-enactment of the
anointing of Aaron, high priest of Israel, upon the descension of Moses
from Mount Sinai (preferably a non-levitical role)
8) hand-held gene-mapping device
9) dates with one or all of the following:
	a. tasya chambers
	b. karen nelson
	c. angela langston
	d. linda gerwin
	e. karen koeneman
	f. jana sharpe
	g. brenda miernyk
	h. tiffany tarrant
	i., i mean... uh, karyn ward
	j. mark vucjevic
10) leather pants worn by jana herd ala matrix (operable word = "worn")
11) james brown's hairbrush
12) aaron burr's luck
13) joseph stalin's resolve
14) wilt chamberlain's libido
15) dana scully's underpants
16) a job
17) joycelyn elder's guide to self-fulfillment
18) first printing lp of men without hat's "safety dance"
19) weird al yankovic's perm
20) alan parson's project
21) gerry chamber's imposing stare
22) hillary clinton
23) apple IIe computer complete with working copy of lemon aid stand
24) steve job's blue jeans
25) a lemur or marmoset
26) front row tickets and backstage pass to a radiohead concert
27) lisa simpson incarnate
28) a 64/65 mustang in mint condition
29) a dead-sea scroll
30) a gameshow entitled, "who doesn't want to be a millionaire"
31) an audience with the hisbollah guerilla leader
32) bladder control
33) a room with a view
34) free aol

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INTERESTING FACT: John Schumacher was an Amish prostitute in a former life.

Royce D. Williams (
Document title:
Created: 02-12-2000 12:08pm
Last updated: 2016-10-15